Day 5 – That Escalated Quickly

I was too tired last minute night to properly pack a lunch… and I accidentally slept longer than I should have this morning. So, I present to you kale, by itself, in a bowl.

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Come to find out, kale by itself is a hellbeast of bitterness and chlorophyll, that when chewed has the type of flavor which somehow seems reminiscent of freshly cut lawn, and the smell you get when you drive past a cow pasture.

I can’t believe I’m self inflicting myself to this for a whole year. This was a horrible idea.

Right now I’m taking a few bites of kale, and then a bite of apple just so I can gag this down. Which is super fun, especially because I don’t really have an appetite to begin with. (If anything I’m feeling kind of queasy from cramps and the OTC med I take to try to ease them.)

This seriously would not be happening as a meal if I didn’t want to have junk food so badly tonight for dinner.

(I think pizza’s giving me super powers.)

Oh, and BTW. As while I was writing this, I was able to gag the whole thing down.

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(Although, I feel like I need a pep talk now, or maybe a hug.)

– A.E.

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Day 5 – That Escalated Quickly

Day 4 – Berries on the Green

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Lunch today is another premade salad (thank goodness, because I have not had proper time to cook or chop veggies since I Monday). The dressing is crazy sour, like, the sourest thing that you can imagine times ten.

I’m not really a fan.

Next time, if I get this one, I may just throw some bacon bits in and some maple syrup for dressing. Heck, I’d even consider eating that combo for breakfast.

Anyway, my weight this morning was 220 exact, and my waist was at 35″. But I’m actually not surprised, as this is about the time when I start to feel like a bloatmonster, which means I have anywhere from 3-5 more days of this weight fluctuation junk to look forward too.

– A. E.

Day 4 – Berries on the Green

Day 3 – Sleep & Salad

Sometimes Wednesdays get crazy for me. It turned out to be one of those Wednesdays. So, this is going to be extra short.

Weighed in at 217 lbs even and 34.5″ on my waist this morning. Which I was a bit surprised by because I had pizza and coffee last night for dinner, which turned out to be a horrible idea, because, well, I’ll explain later in another post.

Today’s salad was a store bought Caesar for lunch, which apparently didn’t come with dressing. 😦 (Which I was actually really looking forward to.)

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Anyway, I finished it off with an apple… And then for dinner stopped and picked up a cheeseburger with fries and the large chocolate shake, because cramps and iron cravings started to hit me hard in the afternoon and I was so exhausted (and still am, because I didn’t get nearly enough sleep) anything that could even vaguely count as cooking simply wasn’t going to happen.

– A.E.

Day 3 – Sleep & Salad

Day 2 – Kale & Leftover Taco Seasoned Tofu, Because Who Has Time to Pack a Proper Lunch

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Today for lunch it was just kale in bowl with some of that leftover tofu that I made last night. I totally didn’t have the will or the time to actually chop a tomato or even open a can of olives. Right now I’m finishing the meal off with an apple to hopefully counteract the two delicious glazed apple doughnuts that I had this morning, the first one for breakfast, and the second one for second breakfast. (Plus, if I don’t finish the apples over the next few days they’re likely to go bad.)

I weighed in at 217.6 lbs, and 34.5″ on my waist. I think it has more to do with the fact that I didn’t gorge myself with crap food for once, simply because I know people (all three of you) may read this.

We’ll see if my resolution holds when I’m looking at chocolate pudding and pizza at school this evening.

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(This was seriously my dinner last Tuesday.)

Well it’s back to work for now.

– A.E.

Day 2 – Kale & Leftover Taco Seasoned Tofu, Because Who Has Time to Pack a Proper Lunch

Day 1 – A Tacoish Kale Salad

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Tonight I had a salad made with raw kale, caramelized onions, tomato, and some taco seasoned tofu, because I am totally a fancy bitch (sometimes).

This morning I had coffee for breakfast, an apple for lunch, and a few turkey sausages. This is seriously the healthiest that I’ve eaten in months. Much better than the great croissant binge of last weekend (it was so good, and yet so, so bad).

Weight was 220.? lbs this morning (I’m 6’1″, stop judging me), and waist was at 35″. In other health logging news, I have been experiencing PMS so bad that I seriously wanted to cry about every two seconds as my body perpetually reminds me that I’m another month closer to my ovaries eventually rotting out of my body, leaving me, presumably, a barren spinster surrounded by cats. Tonight, as I try to dry my tears, I thank the menstrual gods that I only get one or two of these days a month.

Also, I smell like onions now, and will likely have some sort of eczema related uber breakout in response to having ingested their tasty caramelized layers. (Unfortunately, I discovered several years back during an elimination diet, that they’re one of my few trigger foods.)

Aside from that, I need to actually finish the about page, and upload some sort of horrible PMS before photo in order to track any potential progress with this whole salad experiment.

But maybe tomorrow or Wednesday (depending on how late my class goes).

Peace.

– A.E.

Day 1 – A Tacoish Kale Salad